Eleven Section: Chester

Time To Get Rid of Detroit Forever

For years now Detroit has been doing nothing but ruining America's reputation and making our economy even worse. The only thing the city was ever good for was making cars and now it can't even do that. At this point there's only one logical thing for us to do, get rid of it. It is a dying city with nothing good coming out of it. The people of the city are practically begging us to because if we dont clear out the city then the people inside the city probably will. The murder rate is soaring and 7 out of 10 murders go unsolved. Why not just save time and money by getting rid of it now?

Would anyone really miss it? With them gone that's just one less problem for us real hard working Americans to worry about! The unemployment rate is at a crummy 28.9% and is only getting worse. I mean come on, how lazy could the people of the city possibly be? They don't have hurricanes to worry about like New Orleans or a bunch of wildfires like California. Detroit use to be the fourth largest city in America and they still found a way to screw it up!

Once we get rid of the city we could use the extra land for something usefull. I was thinking along the lines of building the worlds largest rollercoaster and making the entire city one giant amusement park! People would come from around the world to go to Amusement Park City and the tourism rates would skyrocket! As for the people already in the city, well, I hear Somalia is very nice this time of year.

ONE SECTION: METOVIC

Stoping Violence; As Simple As Pressing A Button
By: Bato Metovic

Once a child is born into this world, a chip will be planted into his/her brain. This is not your ordinary memory chip for your telephone. This chip is a high tech information brain chip and video camera. The government has decided that brain chips will control the children’s violent tendencies as they grow older. This brain chip will help the government realize when the child has an urge to do something against the law and stop them. The Federal Bureau of Investigation’s Department of Science and Miscellaneous Nonsense (FBIDSMN) has discovered a chip that can not only control your violent tendencies, but also let the government see through your eyes. A representative from the FBIDSMN was quoted to have said “this will not only help us cut down on violence in the nation, but it will let us control the population like a TiVo episode of Family Guy.”

According to the National Criminal Justice Reference Service, statistics show that in 2005, 5,686 young people ages 10 to 24 were murdered—an average of 16 children each day. The NCJRS also released that in 2006, more than 720,000 young people ages 10 to 24were treated in emergency departments for injuries sustained from violence. These chips that will be inserted in the brains of children are meant to stop this from happening. The chip is going to act as a remote control for the government to keep an eye on what the children are doing and thinking. If a thought runs through their mind as to even throw a rock at another child, the government will intervene. This chip sets off an alarm when an excess of testosterone is sent to the brain. It also sets off if the child is born with a psychological disorder that is known to send children over the edge and become violent.

The government was not sure on whom to exactly begin to plant the chips into. They researched and study all types of religions, cultures, races, ethnicities, heights, weights, and genders. The government has come to the conclusion that they will be implanting the chips into families who have a previous history of violence first. The first children getting the chip are newborns. This has become a requirement by law. The next group of participants will be children living in bad neighborhoods and children with previous family history in violence. This will continue to go on until no one is left without a brain in their head and a remote control for that chip in the hand of the government. As for the video camera, it is still a work in progress but the government is trying to group videos together by neighborhoods and the area that the child is in. Professional observers trained to press play and stop on a universal remote will be paid millions of dollars to sit in a chair and watch children play and interact with one another. Protesters of this new craze do not feel comfortable with this. “In 1990’s those men would be considered pedophiles, but now we are supposed to trust these men with our kids,” one protester said. The government is only waiting to conclude talks with the well-known tech company Samsung. This new chapter in governmental technology is looking to take shape in late 2012.

TWO SECTION: {Salvatierra}

Not Smoking is SO last year.

New York City- Many New York smokers have been complaining how many local restaurants and bars have strictly banned smoking. One new yorker stated:

" I cant even take my girlfriend out to eat at her favorite restaurant anymore; since it clearly states on the door"NO SMOKERS ALLOWED." Were being segregated from the rest of the population; whats next? Smokers and non smokers are going to have to use different bathrooms and water fountains?We're not in the 1950's anymore."

A group of angry smokers have formed an organization called G.O.A.T.S (Group Of Angry Tobacco Smokers). They have thought up of ways in which they can co-exist amongst the non-smoking community.

They have created a product called SmokeBalls™ which look like giant human bubbles in which they can smoke as many cigarettes as they please without breaking the law. The inventor of SmokeBalls™,Susie Griffin, said today:

" The idea came to me when I was watching, "The Boy In The Plastic Bubble." It seemed so much fun to live inside one of those bubbles that I said, hey why not make it possible! And besides I've always been a huge fan of John Travolta."

The city liked the idea of having SmokeBalls™ so much , rumor has it that new SmokeBalls™ routes will be added to city streets so transportation could be made easier for SmokeBalls™ owners.

SmokeBalls™ isn't the only trend amongst New Yorkers; many of them have been trying to fashionably quit the bad habit. They have been trying so hard that they came up with a way of making quitting look "cool." Many drugstores are now selling multi-colored, scratch-n-sniff Nicotine patches that have written sayings such as "You can do it!" or "Smokers are Jokers." This product has sold over a million in only the past month, and has become the talk of the town.

These trends are helping smokers pull through the new laws that are being set against them, but they say that if all fails they can just switch to being alcoholics instead of Nicotine addicts. That's the beauty of addiction, there's always an alternative!

one section [Paniagua B]

The Lake Michigan cleaner than ever.



The tourists have passed constantly through this lake.
They are admiring the view of the world’s cleanest lake.
No doubt the reporter from ABC news Charles Thomas
has been filming for the pass 2 days and observed the way that the lake shines ones the sun rises at 6 am. The visibility that the sun emits is like crystal glass. The lake has become top on the headline news in the pass 2 years. Governor Milorad “Rob” Blagojevich has proposed and idea to destroy part of Chicago to make the lake bigger and to let the architects make sculptures. . Coral reefs have been spreading all over the lake making it one of a kind. Chicago zoologists have brought and enormous amounts of Ocean species from around the world. This has caused such commotion that there are already plans to build an underwater mall to be able to admire such beauty. People would be able to do shopping, eat, and also watch a movie. Yes, a movie theater would be built too.
Turbine pipes will be also built inside the lake to be able to keep the water warm. According to Mayor Daley, such plans would be accomplish by the end of 2010. Guess we would be able to enjoy the warms waters until next winter!!
Great news, Director Andrew Stanton has already started filming the second sequel of Finding Nemo 2 in this lake. All of this can not be accomplished by itself; it needed the help of the community like always. Current student Kimberly Nunez from Northeastern Illinois University has sent to make a report for The Independence newspaper and show how every morning citizens walk by just looking for a spot to relax. If everything goes as predicted Lake Michigan will no longer be a lake but an Ocean. Could this really be? And oceans next to Chicago, for more information about our lake go and get The Independence newspaper in the entrance of the library building. Learn about all the changes that could be happening to our city.

Section One: Monroy

Global Warming an Inconvenient Truth or Just an Inconvenient

There are so many people worried about the whole effects about global warming and about what is going to happen to our planet. People put too much worry and stress about this problem when there really is no point in it. There are much bigger and worse problems out there and besides there are simple solutions to the problems that have already been caused by global warming. There are so many solutions to the melting glaciers and the rising sea levels.

Why are so many people complaining that it is going to be too warm in our world? Aren’t people always complaining that it is to cold outside? People should just embrace the sweet warm weather. No more bulky clothes to be worn by everybody. It also means that people can have more vacation time because it will be so warm everywhere. People will have much more time to spend with their family. Also people are saying it is going to get to warm everywhere, have they even been to Chicago, there is crazy snow right when spring is beginning. It gets freezing there it is like global warming never happened, a lot of people in Chicago should appreciate the warm weather.

There are also simple solutions for the melting glaciers and possible sea levels rising. Just dump a whole bunch of ice into the waters. It will be easy no hassle and everybody will win. People could also try and build a giant freezer to place all the polar bears and animals that need cold weather. People could also try and make giant air conditioners for the animals so they can be all nice and cool. Simple easy solutions. As for the rising sea levels they’ll be great for people who love water. Surfers and swimmers will enjoy it a lot.

So people need to stop worrying global warming, nothing is really happening. Maybe they should just take a nice vacation somewhere warm and stop worrying about it so much. There are easy fixes for all the problems.

one section ( 2)

lakes!

ELEVEN SECTION: Dardagan

Skinny America

Greasy fast-food, late nights in front of a television set, and no motivation for exercise is a way of life for 60 million Americans. Some people are not afraid to judge others based on weight.
“When I see an obese person, I just think they are lazy and do not take care of themselves,” said Andrew Johnson, the co executive of the fastest growing fast-food chain in America, McChunky.
The World Health Organization (WHO) has acknowledged obesity as a spreading epidemic. When people eat more calories than they burn off, the extra calories are stored as fat. As this pattern continues, more fat begins to build up. Using the Body Mass Index (BMI), a measure of body fat based on height and weight, doctors determine if a person is “overweight” or “obese”. Any individual with a BMI of 25-30 is considered overweight. Individuals with a BMI of 30 and above are considered obese. 300,000 deaths occur every year due to poor or no exercise and unhealthy nutrition. For the first time in a century, American adolescents face a shorter life expectancy than their parents.
What can we, as individuals who depend on the future generation, do about the crisis faced by our children?
The American Health Organization (AHO) has proposed a plan that has been sent to Washington D.C. for a green light from the Senate. The AHO claims that, if the plan of followed and enforced thoroughly, obesity should be extinct in the American society within 7-10 years.
The plan is referred to as “Skinny America”. It clearly describes many steps which will lead to a healthier society, and all of these steps present a reason for Americans to downsize. First off, limitations have been set on obesity taking into account one’s age and height. Children 5-12 need to be brainwashed into thinking that ugliness and obesity are the same thing. Adolescents 12-19 need to weigh under 150 pounds because their standard height is approximately 5’8. People 19-30 need to weigh under 180, and this is only because these are child-bearing years for women so the weight limit should be set higher. Everyone else needs to weigh under 200 pounds because that is the limit for all people! Now, if certain individuals fall out of the categories listed above, they will not be able to function in the society because the plan proposed will transform the environment into one not accessible by obese people. For one, clothing companies will stop producing big sizes in clothes. The biggest size that will be made will be a medium, so that obese people will be forced to shrink down if they do not want to walk around naked! Doorways will be made more narrow on buses, trains, and public entrances. Obese people will not be served at restaurants or fast-food places! When grocery shopping, they will not be allowed to buy junk food such as soda, chips, or cookies. If after 6 months, the people who were initially put on this weight-loss plan fail to lose weight, they will be put into camps where manual labor will be required in order for them to be fed. They will be asked to complete jobs such as mining, car-washing, and construction in hopes of the obese ones becoming more physically involved. If they do not complete their tasks, they will not be fed for the day. This is a smart way of rewarding them because food is their biggest motivation in life. For the ones who fail to carry out their work, they will slowly commit suicide by not getting fed. This is technically their fault since they are the ones making the decision to work or not which determines their food intake for the day. In 7-10 years, this will be fat-free America.